Category: Basic Training

In my last two posts, Should She Be Your “Best” Friend? and All Men Need “Helpers”, I made the case that man needs to be in a relationship of mutual servanthood with his wife so they can follow God’s command to be fruitful and multiply. But this mutuality leaves open the question: Who should be the leader of the family? And what does that leadership look like? So in this post, I’m going to outline the biblical command that a man should lead his family. I will then describe what it looks like for a man to lead in the next post or two. To be brutally frank, there are a lot of men with no concept or understanding of their God-given role as leaders. They have succumbed to the sin of passivity. This series is mostly to inform those who are yet to be married or are newly married.

In my previous post, All Men Need “Helpers”, I wrote that men must recognize when they need help. I unpacked a biblical truth that God determined that man should not be alone (Genesis 2:18) and created Eve as Ezer kenegdô” (Hebrew for “a helper suitable for him”). God then gave the couple the commandment to be fruitful and multiply in a relationship that helps and serves each other. But does a relationship of mutual servanthood also mean your wife (or any woman if you are single) should become your “best friend”?  Who is Your Best Friend? Answering this question is always tricky for men, especially if you are married. The rules of society today often cause men to answer it with, “Of course, my spouse is my best friend”. To answer otherwise, could imply some unhappiness with the quality of your marriage.  But is that the proper answer?  It seems

Men often talk about “man rules” and the things that we need to do in order to hold onto our proverbial “man cards”. The problem is that many men are bad at taking care of themselves and owning their responsibilities. Some guys call it “taking care of your ‘shit’ ”. What usually follows that type of statement is a list of “manly men doing manly things” like basic grooming skills, knowing how to give a proper handshake, how to treat a woman, dressing properly (including tying a necktie when appropriate) for any occasion, and being able to carry on a coherent conversation. It also means having some basic “man-skills” such as knowing how to swing a hammer and use power tools, being able to fix (or at least maintain) your own car, being able to unclog a toilet, play poker, cook a steak, and manage your own finances and schedule